Keeping it Real in the Lewis House.

I should have known after posting about my state of blissful happiness yesterday that I would have a "keeping it real" kind of day today. God definitely has a sense of humor.

There are a few things that you need as background information to fully appreciate my situation today. First of all, I seriously jacked up my big toe on Monday. I slipped on the stairs and can no longer bend my toe. The entire toe is swollen and my whole foot is discolored. Every step is excrutiatingly painful. Good times.

Carter did his poopoo in the potty yesterday and we have moved him to being in underwear full time. We figure that pull ups are just too comfortable to mess in and have decided that it is worth the mess of underwear if we can get him to make the big leap. So, today is day two of underwear.

So, today I had a lunch date with my precious and very classy friend, Pam. We agreed to meet at Chilis and I loaded up the kids to go enjoy a meal with my sweet friend. I get to the restaurant and Evyn immediately starts fussing. She has never done this. Ever. So I finally decide that she must be hungry, which leaves me limited options as we are just sitting down to eat. So, I get out my nursing cover and apologize profusely to Pam for what I am about to do. I am nursing my sweet child in the middle of Chilis and while I am OK with this, you never know how much you are going to freak out everyone else. It is while Evyn is latched on that Carter says "Watch my trick, Pam" and proceeds to lean over the side of the table and spit in the floor. What? He has never done a trick of this nature before but chooses today to debut his complete lack of manners to one of my nicest friends at a point in time when I can do nothing about it because I am already feeling rather self conscious to have my boob out in the middle of a restaurant.

Our food arrives and we start eating (yes, Evyn is still eating too) and I look at Carter and notice how still he is being and then see the awkward facial expression and decide that he is using the restroom. I ask him if he needs to potty and he tells me that it is too late. I pass Evyn to Pam, grab the diaper bag and take Carter to the bathroom. There is no way to get poopoo underwear off of a three year old without making a mess. I lay him on the changing station and get to work. Right as I am peeling the disgusting Bob the Builder undies off, the door opens and a Chilis employee walks in. The entire restroom reeks of poop and my 40 pound kid is squirming awkwardly on the changing station when the inevitable happens. The poop falls out of the underwear and lands with a loud splat on the floor. It is at this point that I start sweating. I did my best to clean the child, the floor, and the changing station, gather what is left of my dignity and go back to the table. I am fairly sure that Pam will not be inviting me to lunch again.

I forgot to mention that the entire scene was enhanced by my very noticable limp.

Carter fell asleep in the car on the way back home. When I put him down for his nap, he wet the bed. His sheets are in the wash right now.

I still love being a mommy. However, I am so thankful that I got to experience the sweetness of yesterday before being subjected to the sheer humiliation that today brought. And that my friends is what we call "keeping it real" in the Lewis house.